Memorial Day Weekend at the cabin

The reality of forever

I got back from taking Ayana for her final visit with her birth mom. Weird! It seems strange to even start refering to her as 'birth mom' but that is the reality now as we go forward. It was a bit surreal to see 6 children, 5 of which have a level of understand about what severance means. I am conflicted in many different ways. There is a very big part of me that is happy this good bye visit is over, it feels like we can finally move on to creating our new story.  BUT, I also have sorrow for birth mom and reality hit her smack in the face today....this is forever!

We desire nothing more than to raise a daughter to be secure in who she ha been created to be by the Master, and secure in the family He gave her. We have had numerous converations lately about her 'tummy mommy'. (That is an easy way for a 3yr old to understand the difference in her mommys) I tell her over and over that God placed her in her tummy mommy's belly and grew her in our hearts. She smiles but not sure she gets it. This will be an on-going, evolving conversation as the years progress. She believes we are her family and does not yet understand what adoption means. I pray I can be there for her when she finally gets it and needs to grieve her loss. I made sure I took my camera today so when that day comes I will have a picture of her birth mom to show her. I also received a letter from the case worker today. It is from her paternal grandmother. She wrote a letter to each child telling them she was so happy they had safe, secure and loving homes to grow up in now. She wants to be updated once a year but also has a huge desire to see these kids be successful and secure...what a picture of selflessness! So here we go...forward towards adoption. We are going to be an adoptive family...crazy! We are crazy happy with the way our life as a family is evolving and humbled to be given the wonderful responsibility of another child for the rest of our lives. If you get a chance, please send up a pray of comfort for our birth mom and Ayana's 5 siblings...there are several broken hearts tonight.

Playin Games

On Mother's Day we spent the day hangin as a family at home. We enjoyed my favorite breakfast (blueberry pancakes) and dinner. The kids helped Shane make both meals and it was such a blessing to get the day off. We played Twister and had a few laughs. (Not to mention I realized really this is a game for 21 and under...Shane and I don't bend and twist the way we used to!) This family is a treasure...I adore them all.

Grandma and Grandpa Thoma come to town

Grandpa mad tops and it was the hit of the weekend!

Playing "elefun" with Grandma

Pretty Toes!

First time swimming

We spent last weekend with my Dad and his wife in town from Washington. We skype with the every weekend but the kids were over the moon excited to see them in real person! We picked them up at the airport on Friday night and the kids had made great signs to welcome them. We went out to Organ Stop Pizza,  (a favorite thing we did when I was a kid) and then settled in for the weekend. Maryann, Samantha and I went for pedicures on Sat. afternoon which was a real treat. And since they are from a state that is currently in the 50-60's we of course did some swimming too. All in all it was a great 4 days together...hopefully they can come back realy soon.

In the adoption world today is "GOTCHA" day!

Today was like any other morning. We were getting kiddos ready for school and saying goodbye to Grandma and Grandpa Thoma when the phone rang at 7:30am. It was our caseworker for the girls. I was surprised when she was calling but I thought it had to do with the visit that I cancelled because of pink eye. So when she told me that she was calling because she had the ruling from Judge Brodman my heart stopped. It was like time froze...she told us the judge ruled in favor of the severance and that she is now available for adoption. I started crying immediatly. I felt this huge rush of peace overwhelm my heart and I hugged that little girl so hard. When foster care is a part of your life there are moments when you think the case is going in one direction and then it changes course. I have had one toe just over the line of hope that this would happen but to actually hear those words was unbeliveable and a moment I will never forget! So yes she isn't going anywhere and yes we have just started the adoption process and it won't be final until closer to the end of the year, but we are praising our Lord for His glorious plan our daughter and family.

Kiddos

Shane had my Mom take a bunch of pictures for one of my Mother's Day gifts....a digital photo key chain. These are some of my favorites...

Birthday Parrrrrr-ty!

I mean seriously, could she be any more adorable?

Thanking Jesus for cake!!!! She is a hoot!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEETHEART!!

Mother's Day

I could not be more blessed than I am right now! These kids, my hubby mean more to me than any possesion in this world. God has given me a family I never imagined which makes it so much more cool. He knows what I need, want and desire before I even do. I was made homemade blueberry pancakes this morning, had a handmade card and placemat and hugs galore when I woke up. This is a special day!!

Happy 1st Birthday

Happy Birthday to you

Happy Birthday to you

Happy Birthday sweet Leeah

Happy Birthday to you!!!!

Teething

Poor baby has been suffering for about a week. She has to upper eye teeth and two bottom teeth trying to break through right now and while she handles it pretty easy most of the time there are those moments when she just hurts. With all the recalls on pain meds for kids I have reverted back to my tried and true method of frozen blueberries. She LOVES them and I love the purple smile that comes out when she is all done.